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gre范文:历年GRE考试Issue主题范文及评析18

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2012-05-11 12:19

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历年主题考试

【 liuxue86.com - GRE作文 】

GRE写作成为横在中国学生的理想和现实之间的一大障碍,因此,如何攻克写作这道屏障,成为摆在我们面前的首要任务。
Intodayssocietywespendtomuchtimeaddressingissuesthatwillnotprepareusforthetrialsandtributlationsfacingouryoungpeople.
Forexample,thereisawarondrugsthatiseffectingeveryfamilyinamerica,withoutanyconsiderationforrace,gender,orenthicbackground.Thiscountryneedstodevelopasystermonhowtodealwiththisongoingproblemeffectingamericans.Therearecertainissuesthatconstantlytakecenterstageinamerica;forexampleracerelationshasreturntothehorribledaysofthefifiths.Thereisknowdoubtthatwearefacingtroublingtimes,andwearenotpayingattentiontowhatisgoingon.Weneedtogetbacktoourvaluesysterm,family,work,church,andresponsibilityandemphasistoourchildrentheimportancyofeducationandrespectofothers.Ifweprovideahealthymodelwecanhelpcurvetheviolenceandmayheamthethatisdestroyingourschools,citiesandstates.
Finally,ifweareproudofbeingamericans,lesstakethisproblemanddosomethingaboutitbydiversitytrainingandmulti-culturalactivities. 中华考试网(www.liuxue86。com)
Sincerely,
评价
Thisessayprovideslittleevidenceofacoherentresponsetothetopicandcontainssevereandpersistenterrorsinlanguageandsentencestructure.
Theessayseemstodefine"environment"broadly,thoughvaguely,asthe"culturalenvironment."Whiletheideathatenvironmentalproblemsarefundamentallyculturalinorigincouldbethebasisforapromisingessay,thisresponsedoesnotcoherentlydevelopthatidea.Moreover,thewriterdoesnotaddresstheissue’sclaimsaboutinternationalcooperation.Insteadtheessayjumpsfromproblemtoproblemwithoutadequatelydescribingthoseproblems.Forexample,"thewarondrugs"isreferredtoasaproblem,butitisnotclearwhetheritislawenforcement’s"war"ondrugsorpeople’suseofdrugsthatistheissue.
Theessaycontainsnumerouserrorsthatinterferewithcomprehension.Theseincludeerrorsinwordusage("emphasistoourchildren,""lesstakethisproblem")andgrammar("racerelationshasreturnto").Finally,theessayendswithaclosing("Sincerely")thatismoreappropriateforaletterthananessay. 感谢您阅读《历年GRE考试Issue主题范文及评析18 》一文,出国留学网(liuxue86.com)编辑部希望本文能帮助到您。

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