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gre作文修改实例:global university

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2011-06-02 22:18

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gre作文修改实例

【 liuxue86.com - GRE作文 】

  TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."

  It is attempting to agree with the speaker by the nice prospect he describes to us: scholars from all nations come to a global university and cooperate to solve the world's most persistent social problems. (我觉得这个句子有些啰嗦,可以改为It is attempting to agree with the speaker by the nice prospect that scholars from all nations come to a global university and cooperate to solve the world's most persistent social problems.)However, under (the)current international environment, that dream could hardly be realized. Before it fulfill(achieving) its goal, it could first cause numerous social problems.

  Admittedly, many potential social hazards such as environment problems and poverty gap are ubiquitous in most areas, and solving those problems is far beyond one or a few countries’ competence. The achivements of(made by) International Committee of the Red Cross and International Environment Protection Orgnization have substaintiated the the effectiveness of international cooperation. Thus it is considerable to establish a globle university if it could be free from any intervenor.(这个句子可能是我们的思路有偏差,我无法理解,所以无法评论) In that university, students from different countries could exchange ideas and experience, and thus get a more comprehensive view of those issues. Integrating different techniques, they might conceive original and effective methods to solve the persistent social problems.(上下文一直在重复这句话,可以改为 achieve the ends)

  上面一段话,你做出让步,但是就这篇文章而言,我觉得让步段放在倒数第二段比较好,但最大的问题是,你只有让,没有收回来。


  想了解更多GRE作文网的资讯,请访问: GRE作文

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